Confessions

Circle

2011-08-05T10:30:00.000-07:00

I know what it’s to be like lonely
I know what it’s to be to depart
I have been there & done that
Today I am forced again to depart
As I see no love & care!
The misery inside me is killing
Feel this world is cruel with no love
I am carried away by emotions and that’s not valued by any
I begged for love and I begged for care
They pushed me away again & again
See no hope in relationship and feel dumped
They crushed my hope with pain and left me no where
Do I run away or do I end?

Lonely Again

2010-04-09T09:53:00.000-07:00

Feeling lonely on the land I walk,
Feeling lonely air when I stroll:
This lonely life doth take its toll,
In lonely circles all astray.
Feel Lonely in the dark of night
Get scared of weird thoughts
I try dreaming of sweet companions close,
As wine duo with dinner’s dish.
Lonely do these thoughts make me
That draws my blood from my body
Replace it with stream of pain & Cry
To bless my veins with coursing strife
Lonely tears that cool my face
Lonely years are now my friends,
I live with forever and ever

I Love you

2010-02-28T11:17:00.000-08:00

Around the world I have searched and searched
Looking for the one, who hold my hand and say “I love you”
But I have found the love, the love of my life
You're the love of my life that is why I receive you.
As wide as the ocean just waiting to hug you and never let go
You're the one for me and that's all I need to know.
Every kiss bestowed upon me, like fragrance on flowers,
Moonlight for the ocean, Nectar for the bee
Every moment in your arms, like waves to the ocean,
Life without limits, I shall love you forever.
Without you, my life is strife but now I ask for a second chance
Be with me forever and ever, an eternal dance
I wait for you, as the days go by my love is growing inch by inch
I cannot wait to see you again but I wait for you, and your warm kiss.

Lost You

2009-12-23T13:15:00.000-08:00

I remember how it used to be...

Where nothing mattered, it was just you and me.

Candies, walks, gifts, and Long term Talks.

I remember when you said, I was your Life, filled with so much love and made me laugh
Now, when you say it, it's more like a phrase and it makes me cry more & more.

Losing my heart, there forms a crack.

It was created a little while ago... Because of how much I want you back.

The old you, the one I thought I knew.

For all of these years, we went from being friends to being in love...

It seems to me, now, like we’re none of the above.

Tears of pain and tears of hope...

It was these times I need you just to cope.

You turn around and hurt me bad, made me sad.
Those times, When time simply stood still...

and we kissed, that perfect kiss .

Why did you take it away from me?

It's because that is how reality is…….
I want to let go...but then I can't...

I know I should...If only I could.

I have tried and tried. The endless solution; I cried and cried!!!!!

Apprehensions

2008-10-17T04:22:00.000-07:00

If I had give to a chance would that be for you
If I had to get closer would that be you?
If I need arms to Hug would that be yours?
I know I am threading my dreams… without any pearl around..
Do I forget the moment we spent….
Should I let you go your way…
Seeing myself in middle of ocean should I call you to save me...
I see a crystal and should I breakthrough to reach you..
Should I wait for you to respond or let you go……
Would I get hurt when you walk away…
Shall I enfold myself with the glimpse of your smile and treasure till I die?
All these questions seem to blind me. For all I know I’m falling behind.
I witness something not noticed before…………
But what am I to you, I don’t comprehend.

Lost Soul

2008-09-22T12:26:00.000-07:00

Time has passed on
Slipping through my hold
Still I live, I breathe
I have lost myself
Am I where I want to be?
Nothing but an empty shell
I have not the will, the will to care, the will to love
The sadness and the pain, my biggest ever teardrops,
Fell like falling rain which will never stop
I know I lost my myself, I don’t know who I am
My hope is lost in a sea of dreams,
The sound of the rushing ocean is my pain.
If only I could see where my faith has gone,
Maybe i wouldn’t be so lost in the mind of my soul.
I need your warmth, I need your faith
Anything to bring me back,
Anything to find my soul……..

Way Back

2008-09-09T12:01:00.000-07:00

Should I say my day is almost over?
Everything I wanted to do or everything I wanted to say
I make my way back home, before darkness is closed
I think and start wondering
Should I wall myself in a closed dark room..
I close my eyes and reach down my soul
And grab for real me hidden beneath these bare bones
Of what the world has molded me into!
I recall my old days.. Sitting with my friends
Days and nights I spent with my love
Happiness and sadness we shared …..
Silence all around me, the thoughts and feelings that haunt me
Make me go crazy without any answers….
I understand nothing of the myriad of emotions,that have a mind of its own….
As I looked at the horizon, seeking release
From the brute that lived within…
I was at perplexity what to do!
I am stuck in a rat hole that slowly consumed me day after day…
I still made my way the boundaries that once defined me
Wandering on a dream to a land of sunshine

Silent

2008-07-04T10:01:00.000-07:00

I sit and look out upon all the sorrows of the world
I see in low life the mother misused by her children
I see the wife misused by her husband
I mark the ranklings of jealousy…
Yet I am silent
I see the workings of battle, young die today and tomorrow
I see arrogant persons upon laborers, the poor
I see infants been used by rich
Yet I am silent
Change is constant what all say
I see changes to the worst, then what I saw before
I see man change to be mammal
No love, no peace sufferings around
Yet I am silent
We sit and look out upon all the sorrows of the world
Yet we are all silent!!!

I Pen

2008-07-04T09:29:00.000-07:00

After long time I pen
Was so immersed in worldly pleasure
There was no moment to see what I am
Life looked coat of many colors
This made me dream of worldly pleasure
Never a question rose who I am
I pen I pen after a long time.
I saw myself in the mirror
I looked at the person I didn't know
Again question remained unanswered that who I am
Laying back on bed recalled my memories
Time I spent with my love, my laugh along with friends
The momentary time this crossed my brain
Still one question who am I
I pen I pen after a long time
To know who I am, I am searching something to go beyond
I looked inside me and realized dark velvet curtain that hides my soul
Tore open the curtain, a child within, Born free of hate, of suffering and sin…
I pen I pen after a long time

Alone

2008-01-17T11:05:00.000-08:00

The empty feeling that comes from within me
I am longing to share my thoughts and feelings with someone who’ll listen.
I am Standing in a crowded room but feeling alone,
Picking up the phone but having no one to call.
Knowing there is no one, Feeling alone
I know this will never change or makes no difference to you
Realizing your best days have gone.
My Obsession With Depression, Has Taken Hold,
My Addiction to you Is Getting Worse,
I Watch My Blood Role Down The Drain,
I Feel tripped In My Pain, knowing the truth I am alone.
It's obvious you have changed
My shadow laughs at me, that I loved someone like this
Why did you care for me? Maybe your love is killing me
I don't know what’s normal anymore
Everything looks insane………
Now I have decided to drink pain in every delight
and poison in every wine; I never knew it would be so bitter
to be alone, alone, without you.

Fade Away….

2007-12-18T10:06:00.000-08:00

I never thought I would see this day
I never thought I would feel this way,
You were my life.. Yet so much more
My friend, my lover once, is now unknown.
And what hurts the most is I now know what I lost... and I'm alone.
Feeling afraid, cold and lonely
should I back away and build a wall,
and block away how I feel?
May be we both need some time to heal.
You were nice and happy... Close to me
What made you change? So much
That you fail to understand me
You say that you love me and that’s for ever
When I long to tell you how I feel,
you don’t want to hear me.
Would this remain the same forever?
Or would you be back as you were before?
Should I wait…. Or just fade away…

Worthless

2007-12-11T10:00:00.000-08:00

My heart aches just as the day you hurt me
My tears fall as if u betrayed me just yesterday
I never did anything to hurt you, yet you didn’t give a fuck about my feelings
All I want to know is why?
You laughed when you knew that I was in tears,
I was the best friend that you could have ever asked for
You continued to make me cry and feel worthless.
My tears come from deep within my soul.
I cried so long
I cried, while you were away and never cared
And u called yourself as my love?
I trusted you, I called you my life
I loved you more than anyone could ever do
I was always by your side.
I never did anything to hurt you, yet u hurt me more than my heart could take
All I want to know is why?
To tell you the truth
I miss us talking all night long about nothing and everything.
I miss you always being there to hear my pain.
I miss the way that you never judged me or looked down upon me.
I miss the fact that I thought you loved me and that you would never hurt me.
I never did anything to hurt you, yet you hurt me for all my life
All I want to know is why?

Endless Love

2007-10-17T16:14:00.000-07:00

I love you so deeply,
I love the sound of your voice
You are perfect to me in every single way.
I love your warm smile and your kind
The joy that you bring to my life every day
You are perfect to me, with everything you do.
I love you today, and I'll love you forever with all of my heart
because there is no life without your love in my heart
You are perfect to me, in the way you act.
Let my dream come true to garland you as a perfect man
Having you in my life is what I want for ever.
The smiles you share, the loving words you tell me
How you have touched my life and made me who I am
No words I can write and say, how much I love you
And how much you are mean to me.
Always, I want to share all my love with you
because I found in you my endless love.

Here

2007-09-12T16:02:00.000-07:00

Should I question why am I here?
Do I have a purpose to live?
I think and roll merry Jane
Try to dream which I never seen.
Alone to cry and alone to frown
Alone to discover who I am?
I lost my morning dew,
But no one has any clue
All night I feel deeply sick
I gulp a beer then I get silly kick
Is this what I looked forward?
Without any answer I wander.
I look at mirror but don’t see inside me
It’s all darkness which not suppose to be
There's more to this, I’ll tell you that for sure,
There's something here or I just might die.

With Me

2007-09-12T16:00:00.000-07:00

You will always be with me
Trust me once and believe in what I say.
If you see inside my soul,
You would know how I long for you
In always ways you comfort me,
It’s not just the reason I love you
I love you the way you are.
I could search the whole world over
I will never find another love
Like the love I find in you
So if you could see inside my soul
You would know I am blessed
Because I have you here with me

Eternal love

2007-09-12T15:56:00.000-07:00

An unspoken love that couldn’t been seen
Unites two hearts with only a dream
It’s a destined encounter which never took place
Commended our love but left no trace
Our language of true love is forever
That’s why our love goes anywhere
You're out of reach but I'm very far behind
To dream of you and you being mine forever
Our bond is blessed and worshipped from afar
Can no longer be seen but written in the stars

Hurt

2007-07-18T06:37:00.000-07:00

I wish I was someone,
To see why I m hurt so badly?
I m drowning in my tears
With the silence on my face.
Lonely and cold I lay in my room,
Thinking why am I alone?
I roll and run on grass
Lost in thought inside my head
Slowly sorting fact from world of madness.
I can’t express my strong emotions
They are buried in the grave.
I’m dizzy with grief just feeling so dead
Would I feel the same all my way?
Would there be no answer for all I say?

Scared

2007-07-17T11:55:00.000-07:00

I am Scared in this world
Alone I stay in dark.
I pray alone to survive
I am scared I may not survive.
I wake up one day and I decide to touch the sky
I am scared I may not reach the sky
I don’t know what I am doing
Or what I should have done
Thinking again I get scared.
I walk thousands mile
But I don’t think for a while.
I alone stare at sky
For no reason why?
I walk with broken heart
With tears filled in my eye and sadness on my face
I am scared I may again cry.
I don’t know where I go and what I do
I am insane in this bad world
I am not scared that I will die.

Complete

2007-07-17T11:30:00.000-07:00

Touch my heart you will feel, listen to my breath you will listen
Look into me you would know you’re a special part of me
I m not strong without your love
When everything seems to go wrong
You lift me up with the hug of yours
Make me believe in life again
I carve for your love, strive for it, fight for it and I would die
The day I find I know I m complete.
You just took me the way I m, never asked anything in return
Your love ever be
Regardless of what that may mean to me
My heart is weakened and my senses still numb
Yet still I smile when you hold me tight
Your Love is like a gentle breeze
That cascades through entire being.
You touched my hand and lit a spark in my body,
You stared into my eyes and saw straight into my soul,
You put your arms around me and I was finally complete.

Me And You

2007-07-02T15:37:00.000-07:00

Me and you Friends at first
Been close very emotional
Then I realized I am in love with you
But a friend was what I agreed to be.
Emotions you gave to me
I could never let be
I knew what I thought was right.
When confessed I Love you, was the happiest moment
I never felt it before, under any circumstance
You showed me joy and love
That I ever hoped before...
Me and You in love for ever.
You and I know lots of thorns on our way
Still we would walk together on that way
No matter how less time we spent
We never know how long
The eternal bond will last forever
I and you tied for ever!

Love

2007-07-02T15:34:00.000-07:00

Love is a feeling that’s sweet
Love is a feeling that cannot beat
Love is me and Love is you.
Love is emotion that we feel deep inside
Love is the understanding between us
Love is amenity, did you live it?
Love is a shock, did you suffer it..?
Love is a promise, did you swear for it?
Love is respect, love is dreams
Love is two souls; me and you.
God made love and we felt it
Love is kind, love is gentle
Love is if you have a special someone and I have you.
Love is truth and selfless
Love is unconditional just like mine and yours.

Y

2007-07-02T15:31:00.000-07:00

When I think of you I get sick
When I think of you I am scared to death
When I see you, I want to run away from the look in your eyes
When you stare at me I will turn back
Forget all the moments we have had.
Why did u lie you will be my best friend for ever,
When you wanted to leave me alone.
Why did you lie you will be there for me,
When you knew you will go your way.
It was so beautiful to be with you
Everyday we laughed, without any pain
When you got new ones, you laughed with them
Giving me all the pain.
I am a fool still I think of you
I am a fool still I crave for you
I moved away from you, just like you asked
Why you pushed me away keeping my soul with you
I remember it was perfect, the friendship that we had had
But soon we suffocated and everything turned bad
Deep down it hurts me and you that we won't talk again
So we hide it with our anger, it conceals all of our pain
I still feel sick, I m still scared to death
I would still run away,
Because of you!

Time

2007-07-02T15:28:00.000-07:00

I remember the time we spent
I remember the days we laughed
I start to think about all we had
I think I have to walk on losing my sight
What changed your mind?
What keeps you blind?
Why have you changed so fast?
At last you left me behind.
My heart will cry, my soul may die
Still I m alone deep inside
I confess you’re my never ending love
You’re the one I love for ever
I don’t care even if I m hurt inside
Why do I have to cry all the night?
Why do I have to get psyched?
I know I am all alone
Still I would survive.

Broken heart

2007-07-02T15:25:00.000-07:00

I was broke, my heart was shattered
In the depth of sorrow and hatred
I found no ways, no rays
Life seems to be a desert, burning me always
I walk alone in search of peace
Found only pain with no gain
Trusted you all this while
Walked besides with all my hopes
Never realized it’s just a dream.
I made u laugh, I showed you love
Making me cry, u shattered my love
I was broke, my heart was shattered
In the depth of sorrow and hatred.
I am scared still I survived
For no reason as in why?
Tears slowly ran down my face
I would live even though I meant to die
My trust caught rust
Soul was killed by beast like u
Still I would survive, asking a question to myself y?
I was broke, my heart was shattered
In the depth of sorrow and hatred
Never make a mistake seeing u again
I know it will hurt me with all the pain
I would walk alone all my way
May be one day I would see a ray……
It’s Just a broken heart, you go your way
Don’t ask y. I am happy this way.

Die

2007-06-29T16:16:00.000-07:00

I feel I want to die
But I don’t know why?
Around me everything looks sad
I feel this world is bad.
Deep inside my heart I feel blood stopped flowing
Is that because I feel I m dieing.
I know I can’t talk and I can’t relate
I know I can’t cry because my eyes are dry.
No taught run in my mind
I feel I have become insane
Should I call this life?
Do I really need to live?
No I decide I will die.

Dark

2007-06-29T16:10:00.000-07:00

I see darkness in me
I feel I have lost the battle
The fire has died, my light blown away
By an unwanted breeze...
I feel only silence, it’s a maddening silence
It is suffocating, draining my brain
The emptiness is within me, killing me whole,
Leaving nothing left but an empty soul.
Whom do I search for? What shall I question?
I find no answer anywhere.
Question asked do u understand me,
I say yes, but whom would I question?
I question my supreme,
Do I not sincerely and deeply love them?
Why do they then hurt me so often,
If not always?
My mind is clear, but not my heart
But no matter what happens
My feelings are still enclosed
Questioning me
Is this darkness an end of me?