Apprehensions

If I had give to a chance would that be for you
If I had to get closer would that be you?
If I need arms to Hug would that be yours?
I know I am threading my dreams… without any pearl around..
Do I forget the moment we spent….
Should I let you go your way…
Seeing myself in middle of ocean should I call you to save me...
I see a crystal and should I breakthrough to reach you..
Should I wait for you to respond or let you go……
Would I get hurt when you walk away…
Shall I enfold myself with the glimpse of your smile and treasure till I die?
All these questions seem to blind me. For all I know I’m falling behind.
I witness something not noticed before…………
But what am I to you, I don’t comprehend.

Lost Soul

Time has passed on
Slipping through my hold
Still I live, I breathe
I have lost myself
Am I where I want to be?
Nothing but an empty shell
I have not the will, the will to care, the will to love
The sadness and the pain, my biggest ever teardrops,
Fell like falling rain which will never stop
I know I lost my myself, I don’t know who I am
My hope is lost in a sea of dreams,
The sound of the rushing ocean is my pain.
If only I could see where my faith has gone,
Maybe i wouldn’t be so lost in the mind of my soul.
I need your warmth, I need your faith
Anything to bring me back,
Anything to find my soul……..

Way Back

Should I say my day is almost over?
Everything I wanted to do or everything I wanted to say
I make my way back home, before darkness is closed
I think and start wondering
Should I wall myself in a closed dark room..
I close my eyes and reach down my soul
And grab for real me hidden beneath these bare bones
Of what the world has molded me into!
I recall my old days.. Sitting with my friends
Days and nights I spent with my love
Happiness and sadness we shared …..
Silence all around me, the thoughts and feelings that haunt me
Make me go crazy without any answers….
I understand nothing of the myriad of emotions,that have a mind of its own….
As I looked at the horizon, seeking release
From the brute that lived within…
I was at perplexity what to do!
I am stuck in a rat hole that slowly consumed me day after day…
I still made my way the boundaries that once defined me
Wandering on a dream to a land of sunshine

Silent

I sit and look out upon all the sorrows of the world
I see in low life the mother misused by her children
I see the wife misused by her husband
I mark the ranklings of jealousy…
Yet I am silent
I see the workings of battle, young die today and tomorrow
I see arrogant persons upon laborers, the poor
I see infants been used by rich
Yet I am silent
Change is constant what all say
I see changes to the worst, then what I saw before
I see man change to be mammal
No love, no peace sufferings around
Yet I am silent
We sit and look out upon all the sorrows of the world
Yet we are all silent!!!

I Pen

After long time I pen
Was so immersed in worldly pleasure
There was no moment to see what I am
Life looked coat of many colors
This made me dream of worldly pleasure
Never a question rose who I am
I pen I pen after a long time.
I saw myself in the mirror
I looked at the person I didn't know
Again question remained unanswered that who I am
Laying back on bed recalled my memories
Time I spent with my love, my laugh along with friends
The momentary time this crossed my brain
Still one question who am I
I pen I pen after a long time
To know who I am, I am searching something to go beyond
I looked inside me and realized dark velvet curtain that hides my soul
Tore open the curtain, a child within, Born free of hate, of suffering and sin…
I pen I pen after a long time

Alone

The empty feeling that comes from within me
I am longing to share my thoughts and feelings with someone who’ll listen.
I am Standing in a crowded room but feeling alone,
Picking up the phone but having no one to call.
Knowing there is no one, Feeling alone
I know this will never change or makes no difference to you
Realizing your best days have gone.
My Obsession With Depression, Has Taken Hold,
My Addiction to you Is Getting Worse,
I Watch My Blood Role Down The Drain,
I Feel tripped In My Pain, knowing the truth I am alone.
It's obvious you have changed
My shadow laughs at me, that I loved someone like this
Why did you care for me? Maybe your love is killing me
I don't know what’s normal anymore
Everything looks insane………
Now I have decided to drink pain in every delight
and poison in every wine; I never knew it would be so bitter
to be alone, alone, without you.